Who's A Mama's Boy?
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Posted:Jul 10, 2006 4:36 pm
Last Updated:Aug 13, 2016 10:08 am
7866 Views
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It's been on the horizon. Women have intuitively known it for decades. Some men supected it might come to this. A few brave transgenders have taken action to join ranks with the inevitable winners. Most people who knew, kept it quiet. After all, the poor dears ... did they really need to know? Let them keep their pride.
In a major breakthrough, researchers have for the first time succeeded in using artificially-grown sperm to fertilise eggs, writes FIONA MACRAE, of the Daily Mail on 10th July 2006
And fellas, we should have seen it coming. Or cumming. Whatever.
We had the chance in the 70's. Shape up. Start paying attention. Listen to our feelings. Make the bed, do the dishes. Rub her feet.
Nope. We didn't. We got uppity, and beat back the womens' liberation movement. Stuffed em right back into their bras and barefeet.
Pay a women the same as a man? You got to be kidding, right?
Respect her in the morning. Sheeeit. That's for sissies.
Well we had our chances.
If they wanted babies, they needed a man, right, RIGHT!
Wrong.
Stem cells and petri dishes.
You've come a long way, baby.
Who's a mama's boy, now?
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The Hammer Was Nailed Cheating
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Posted:Jul 6, 2006 8:51 pm
Last Updated:Sep 16, 2011 7:29 pm
8033 Views
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I betcha I know what you were thinking.
Get your mind out of the gutter.
No, this about THE Hammer, the ex Speaker to Animals of the US House of Representatives, Tom Delay.
Remember him, aka Hammer. Nice Christian fella from Texas? The one that with his busom body Jack Abramhoff protected the importation of women to the Northern Mariana Islands to work in sweatshops at slave wages, endure forced abortions and forced into , while allowing factory owners to stamp "Made in America" on garment labels.
Delay, who is under indictment for money laundering ran for and won the Republican nomination for Congress in the 2006 mid-terms.
Then, after sucessfully winning his party's nomination, announced he was "moving" to Virginia, in an effort to allow the party to name a replacement candidate. Someone not quite so busy with his lawyers and legal defense. And some-one that Delay and his back room cronies could hand-pick.
Trouble is, Texas law doesn't allow designation of a replacement candidate unless the primary winner is ineligible, e.g. Texas has an anti-bait and switch statute to prevent this type of shenanigans. And since Tom isn't sick, dead, or convicted, his declaration that he plans to move his residence to Virginia doesn't take him off the hook. He's still eligible to run for office in Texas no matter where he says he lives (per the US Constitution), which (oddly) only requires that a candidate for the House be a resident on election day.
Delay could withdraw, but, in another odd quirk of Texas law, if Delay withdraws from the race, the Republicans are left with NO candidate on the November ballot.
Needless to say ... sometimes a Hammer is the wrong tool for the job, especially when what you really needed was a screwdriver.
And just once (until the legal appeals are exhausted), it looks like:
The Hammer got screwed.
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I blame it on the NSA
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Posted:Jul 3, 2006 6:13 pm
Last Updated:Sep 6, 2019 7:59 pm
7945 Views
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We've been out-of-touch for some time. Partly, because we're both awfully busy. But that's not the whole story.
I blame it on the NSA.
When the news broke that the NSA was spying on American citizens, in violation of the 4th amendment, and in violation of the clear law of the land, we got worried.
Then we learned that the feds are monitoring nearly all web traffic.
Like this place.
Whew. Was big brother watching?
Suppose we can kiss the ole security clearance goodbye now.
But the truth is that we'd love (or at least half of us) would love to blog about political matters, and that seemed ... inappropriate ... for a forum dedicated to adult activities.
So we started another blog and started blogging and commenting on political sites. It became an obsession. Which, while satisfying, was just as empty as masturbation. Sure, it satisfies, but ... you know ... it ain't the same as sex.
Still, it did let us talk about things that mattered. Like health care. Like privacy. Like abortion. Like gay rights. Grown up issues.
Things that people disagree about. Passionately.
But, truth be told ... we missed blogging here, as well.
There's a community here that you don't find elsewhere. We missed our friends. I miss our friends.
So we're back.
We probably won't blog as often.
We probably will mix in some issues oriented blogs, which, we know, will be excruciatingly boring. But, our sex lifes are still fair game. And ohh boy ... we have some great stories to tell.
But we'll be with friends.
Coffee anyone?
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Decisions ...
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Posted:May 23, 2006 4:01 pm
Last Updated:Jul 3, 2006 5:53 pm
7418 Views
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Its been quite a bit since we last posted. Not that we haven't wanted to post more, but because posting about our sexual exploits was getting to be a bit, erhm, unstimulating, if you know what we mean.
We haven't stopped playing. But we've quite a bit of experience with three-somes, and now we're looking into four-somes. Again, we'll take our time and find the right couple. Maybe we can post a blog on that.
But, the main point of this blog entry is this, should we? Blog, that is. (Not the four-some. Just think, play a game of mixed doubles, shower, and play a game of ... well, you get the idea.)
Really, be honest. Are you interested? Do you care?
Do let us know. And no hard feelings. We're both pretty open and grown up.
Love from us ..
CantonOhCouple
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Until After Evermore
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Posted:Mar 17, 2006 4:51 pm
Last Updated:Sep 6, 2019 7:59 pm
8279 Views
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The seasons turn. It is has been spring, then summer, now winter. It will soon be spring again, and with spring will come the time of new beginnings. The gentle warmth of spring will cast away winter's cloak, the grass will green … buds will burst with new life.
It is fitting somehow; to talk of eternity in the context of the turning of the seasons, each following another, in perpetual harmony, each season makes way for the next. An eternal cycle that never ends, will never end, for surely even if the universe should falter and collapse upon itself, there would be spring. And yet, each cycle is never the same as the last, always new, always different.
Life, then, is a spiral, which began, and repeats, and grows upon itself, unto eternity. And while the beginning of life is mystery, the pattern of life is graven deeply within every one of us. We know life, we are life, and life itself gives the gift, and the meaning of life.
How then, should we, mere mortals, give meaning to life? Many give vows of troth and of fidelity in celebration of life, only to find their troth broken, sundered, upon the shoals of time. Why? I wonder if, perhaps, they did not look to life itself, as counselor. And, instead, looked within and not without.
I think it wise then, to pattern our affairs upon the seasons: A time of renewal, a time of growth, a time to harvest, and a time to rest. And while each season is a marvel, new, and wonderful, the cycle of life is greater still, grand beyond all comprehension.
It is not the rock, then, that should be the pattern of our existence. While the rock may indeed be pure, as in the purest of love, it is also rigid, unyielding, and in the end, indifferent. It simply is. But mere rock no matter how strong, or how pure, may shatter and crumble into dust. Even the gentlest of rain will, in time, reduce the obstinate, uncaring, purity of rock, to little more than grains of sand, as the sands of the hourglass measures not the beginning, but the end of things.
Consider instead, a humble blade of grass as candidate. It does not stand before the wind; it bends, it welcomes the rain, it endures, it renews itself in season, and in the end, it is immortal, outliving the mightiest of mountains.
So, if love should be immortal, outlasting this life, what vows would we give, what truth would we seek, to celebrate life, to celebrate love, to celebrate the union that we seek?
We pledge to humbly bend before the wind, to love life, to endure pain, to renew ourselves in season, ever changing, always caring, until … after evermore.
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Sex Bots, Cyber Sluts & Stepford Wives
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Posted:Mar 6, 2006 5:47 pm
Last Updated:Apr 4, 2006 4:55 pm
9154 Views
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If you’re a even a casual fan of technology, then Moore’s Law (loosely) states the capacity of integrated circuits, computer disk drives, etc. will roughly double every year for the foreseeable future. We’ve seen the effect of Moore’s Law profoundly affect our lives in just the past two decades. The IBM PC and the Microsoft Disk Operating System (DOS) were introduced in 1981, barely 25 years ago. The Internet, as we know it? The “WWW” standards were established in 1991 to little acclaim. It wasn’t until 1993 that the press and industry began to notice. Search engines? Google came online in 1997.
Impressed? The sheer growth in “raw” power is astounding. That’s the trend. More power!
Hold that thought.
A “bot” is a computer program. In on-line game play, bots are computer controlled players or opponents. SexBots trace their roots to “Eliza”, a primitive text chat program dreamed up by Joseph Weizenbaum that parodied a human therapist. For example, if the user stated, “I hate my mother”, the program might respond with “Who else do you hate?” In short, the program parsed the user’s input, located key words and replied by either twisting the original input, or pseudo-randomly selecting from a list of canned responses.
As you might imagine, it wasn’t too long before geeks began experimenting with computer programs, like “Eliza”, to carry on “adult” conversations. In this case, the goal is a “bot” that can simulate the responses of a sexy, horny, girlfriend. After all, why not?
Cybersex with a sexbot lack stimulating visuals. Not to worry. You want tits? We got tits! Small ones, large ones, all sizes.
3DSlut is an example of an animated sex “game”, where the player (horny guy) can give explicit instructions to, you guessed it, an animated woman. And there’s more. Not only can you tell your oh-so-friendly 3DSlut to strip naked, if you cursor over her pussy with your mouse, oh BABY, watch her cum. No kidding. And no wet spot!
VirtualFem takes the fantasy in a different direction by using movie clips of real-life models, coupled with an artificial intelligence engine. According to their website:
VirtualFem™ lets you interact with a very cute girlfriend, and tell her what to do. A Virtual Girlfriend who lives inside your computer; she will do anything you ask, understands plain English, and speaks to you out loud! Clever usage of high-quality full-motion MPEG video makes VirtualFems come to life!
Perhaps they meant to write “cum” to life. For this product, the company touts LOTS of attractive female models, all sizes, ages, shapes, colors and attitudes Give em your best line and, who knows, she might strip naked, right there “inside your computer”. Although we don’t think rubbing her clit with your mouse has quite the same effect as advertised on 3DSluts. Maybe in the next release?
On the other hand this software offers one feature that is sure to be a hit:
“Don't like what she says or does? Just change her via interactive brain-editing!”
Heaven! Interactive brain-editing. Every man’s dream. Honey, we need to change your programming, just a little. Crank up the slut parameters and tweak the bitch bits.
We know, we know. We can’t tell you how disgusted we were as we bookmarked the web site. Just for future research, of course. But, it is still “all in your computer”. Nice toy, but no “real” joy(stick).
Unbeknownst to the good folks at Honda, they have introduced the technology for the next logical step, pun intended. Honda debuted ASIMO in December 2005, a 4 foot walking, humanoid robot, albeit it does have a few parts missing, but hey, a little latex here, a little silicon prosthesis there, a set of knee pads … well, you get the picture.
Now put these trends together.
Massive growth of computing capacity. AI programs that talk and act like a -age boys wet dream. Robots designed to simulate humanoid shape and form. Slap on some silicon gel flesh, paint the toes, pluck the eyebrows, throw on a demi bra and thong, and we’re ready to let the good time roll.
We predict you’ll be able to buy the kit version at Radio Shack in less than 10 years with your pick of flesh tones and bra size. For a small premium, you’ll be able to equip her (it?) with exchangeable genitalia … you know … for the adventurous guys. Sure beats a strap on!
Finally, you’re very own, customized, Mark IV, Stepford Wife.
Batteries not included.
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I Dream of Green Avocados
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Posted:Mar 1, 2006 7:31 pm
Last Updated:Mar 11, 2006 6:37 am
8450 Views
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I never dream, well, I never remember dreams. Except the ones that wake me up, but that’s usually because the twins are just too damn hot. Ok, I remember wet dreams. But that’s it, until last night …
Last night, I dreamt of green avocados. And peanut butter on bread.
This was weird. I mean really weird. In the dream, there’s a crisis. The team is working together to resolve it. And, at the crucial moment, the problem is documented.
The problem is a green avocado. If that’s not weird enough, this avocado is skinned. Yes, skinned.
Then, we’re shown two slices of bread. One slice has peanut butter slathered on it. The other has chunky peanut butter. Voices mutter, “See, they are NOT the same”.
Now this is where I start to wake up. And the odd part is that I’m still deeply engaged in trying to solve the problem of green avocados and peanut butter. It takes several minutes … but creakily, with fits and starts, my conscious wrestles my subconscious …
I remember that my first logically coherent thought was WTF?
What the hell was that all about? Avocados, peanut butter, bread? Where were the twins, dammit!
The next morning I say “you won’t believe this dream”. After she stopped laughing at me, she suggested that I look up the symbolism on the web. Maybe it means something.
So I did.
Fruit
To see fruit in your dream, signifies a period of growth, abundance and financial gain. Fruits generally represent lust and sexuality. In particular green fruit in your dream denotes your hastiness and disappointed efforts. You need to work harder and longer in order to achieve your goals.
Peanut Butter
To see or eat peanut butter in your dream, suggests that you are having difficulties communicating your thoughts and ideas. It may also mean a misunderstanding; your words are coming out all wrong.
Bread
To see bread in your dream, represents the basic needs of life. Bread may signify the positive qualities and great things you have learned on your journey of life.
Another WTF moment …
That very evening before going to bed we’d finished off a bottle of wine (or was it two bottles?) discussing, you guessed it, sex. And we had both struggled to express ourselves, with false starts and confusion about what we were trying to express to each other. In the end we found common ground that supported each others needs.
Before this, I hadn’t put much stock in dreams. I’m a believer now.
Now that that is solved, I wonder … what do the twins mean?
I’m going to bed. I’ll let you know what I find out.
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Imagine
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Posted:Feb 27, 2006 4:41 pm
Last Updated:Mar 5, 2006 9:27 pm
8072 Views
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I can imagine the day,
my dear,
when loving you,
is like air,
or rain in spring,
the commonplace things,
we treasure, once lost ...
found.
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6
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We Are ...
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Posted:Feb 27, 2006 4:35 pm
Last Updated:Mar 5, 2006 9:27 pm
8045 Views
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Water, runs,
and makes it way,
to the sea,
each step of its journey,
it alters the ground,
carving rocks, with little
but persistence.
As if to say,
I am,
make way,
I am.
If,
our love, is
like water,
renewed by gentle rains,
or thunderstorms,
that clash in the night.
Then, we change the ground,
and carve our love,
with nothing but care,
gentle persistence,
to last,
for at least a little while,
on this earth, and after.
To say,
“we are”.
We are …
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2
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Family Values?
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Posted:Feb 22, 2006 6:41 pm
Last Updated:Mar 5, 2006 9:27 pm
8348 Views
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Get ready for election “wedge” politics circa 2006.
USA Today in an article dated Feb 20 reports that conservative Christian groups are pushing for legislation or ballot initiatives to outlaw adoption by gays in 16 states, including key battleground states.
"Now that we've defined what marriage is, we need to take that further and say deserve to be in that relationship," says Greg Quinlan of Ohio's Pro-Family Network, a conservative Christian group.
A couple of key points:
First, there are thousands of in Ohio and across the nation who are unable to secure adoption by “natural families”, even by heterosexual single men or women. Truth!
Second, the American Academy of Pediatrics, the Welfare League of America (CWLA) and adoption advocacy groups cite research that with gay or lesbian parents fare as well as those raised in families with a mother and a father.
"Marriage or any civil union has been declared unconstitutional (in Ohio), so why would they be able to adopt ?" asks the Rev. Russell Johnson, chairman of the Ohio Restoration Project, a conservative Christian group. "These people cannot reproduce. ... Experimenting on through gay adoption is a problem."
Let’s think about the logic here. First, “these people” do reproduce. And when “they” do, wouldn’t this logic require that we “save” these from “experimentation” as well? To be sure, we could require all parents of newborns to declare their sexual orientation at the maternity ward doors. Close monitoring (by the NSA) could root out the rest.
So what’s going on here? It could be “concern” for , but notice the political implications. As reported in USA Today:
Republicans battered by questions over ethics and Iraq "might well" use the adoption issue to deflect attention and draw out conservatives in close Senate and governor races in states such as Missouri and Ohio, says Sherry Bebitch Jeffe, University of Southern California political scientist.
The aim is to replicate 2004, says Julie Brueggemann of the gay rights group PROMO: Personal Rights of Missourians. She says marriage initiatives mobilized conservative voters in 2004 and helped President Bush win in closely contested states such as Ohio. Republicans "see this as a get-out-the-vote tactic."
From the standpoint of election year politics, it’s brilliant! Genius!
Welcome to Ohio. The Heart of it All.
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The Pussy Wars
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Posted:Feb 19, 2006 10:57 am
Last Updated:Oct 17, 2008 5:47 pm
8323 Views
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In western industrialized countries the ratio of men to women is 100:105. Meaning there are 105 women for every 100 men, which occurs naturally as a result of women’s superior ability to fight off disease.
Huh? For guys, this is good news, bad news story. Good news if you’re alive. The odds of getting some went up, right? The bad news? You really, really, ought to get the last will and testament written.
For western women, its certainly explains why it’s so hard to find a good man. The good ones are married or dead. We exaggerate, but then, after looking at some of the mail we receive, maybe we’re not that far from the truth.
Wait, we forgot Utah. Maybe it does balance out.
But, that’s for the west. The situation is significantly different in Asia and Africa.
In a 1990 essay in The New York Review of Books the Nobel laureate Amartya Sen noted that in China and India there were only 94 women for every 100 men. When Sen computed how many women should have been alive in parts of Asia and North Africa, the results were compelling. More than 100 million females were missing.
Put that in perspective. That’s nearly equal to the ENTIRE adult female population of the United States. We’re talking a serious coochie shortage guys. Huge.
The disturbing truth is the people in Asian countries like China and India have practiced gender selection. First, through female infanticide, and with the advent of ultrasound, sex selective abortions to insure a bouncing baby boy. In India alone, more than 10 million female fetuses may have been aborted in the past 20 years (since the advent of ultrasound). This in spite of legislation outlawing the practice of gender based abortions.
In China, the draconian population control measures of one family, one , have increased the pressure on women to produce male heirs. And, if it’s a girl, so-solly, a trip to the well for a bucket of cold water, and try, try again.
As a side note, sex selection is NOT the intended result of national government policies. It’s the “natural” result of gender bias by millions of families in this part of the world that favor male progeny. It doesn’t make sense. But it is.
See where this is going? In 5, 10, 15, 20 years we’re talking about the most populous continent on the face of the earth, with tens of millions of very, very, horny men who will be faced with the law of unintended consequences. They aint gonna get any.
And you think YOU can’t get a date. To bad for them, right? Wrong. Look ahead a bit. India and China are gaining military and economic clout at an amazing rate.
Remember, wars between nation states are essentially . You have something I want, so I beat you over the head and take it by force. Reading history, even for so called “wars of liberation”, you’ll notice that land, natural resources or trade are a central component of the conflict.
Paying attention? 100 million men with nothing to fuck coupled with the economic and military capability to take what they want.
Hang on to your ass, it’s inevitable, it’s Armageddon, it’s …
The Pussy Wars.
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State of the Union
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Posted:Feb 12, 2006 10:39 am
Last Updated:Mar 5, 2006 9:27 pm
7891 Views
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Libby, the former chief of staff to Vice President Dick Cheney, was told to leak classified information to journalists to “influence” public perception.
The CIA official responsible for coordinating US Intelligence in the Middle East accuses the Bush administration of “cherry picking” intelligence to support its position on going to war with Iraq.
Bush claims of “weapons of mass destruction” to justify the war in Iraq. False.
Bush claims of “Al Qaeda ties to Iraq” to justify the war in Iraq. False.
U.S. death toll in Iraq, 2,260 and rising. And by the way, does anyone know how many innocent Iraqi civilians have been killed in the aftermath of war in Iraq?
The White House knew of the potential impact of Hurricane Katrina and of the devastating levee breaks in New Orleans on the night of the storm, while publicly stating that it didn’t learn until the following day, all the while Bush and Cheney “vacationed”.
U.S. death toll from Hurricane Katrina. More than 1,300 hundred bodies have washed up but officials’ state “we will never know”.
Bush reveals Al Qaeda 2002 plot to hijack an aircraft using “shoe bombs” to “breach the cockpit door” in an effort to shore up support for his domestic spying program. Bush fails to mention that the plot was revealed thru “intense” interrogations of Al Qaeda detainees. Odd that he mentions this story now. Odd that he didn’t bother to notify the mayor of Los Angeles. Even odder, is the fact that cockpit doors were NOT armored in 2002.
Tom Delay, former Republican House Majority Leader is indicted for money laundering charges.
U.S. racks up record trade deficit in '05. $725.8 billion total is a 17.5% increase over 2004's mark.
Bush claims he didn’t know Abramhoff personally, in spite of receiving more than $100,000 dollars in campaign contributions from the lobbyist while Abramhoff, (who has pleaded guilty in a fraud and bribery case and is now helping prosecutors investigate lawmakers, congressional aides and administration officials) states "The guy saw me in almost a dozen settings, and joked with me about a bunch of things, including details of my . Perhaps he has forgotten everything, who knows," Abramoff wrote in an e-mail to Kim Eisler, national editor of the Washingtonian magazine.
$423 billion. That’s this year’s projected budget deficit.
2.2 trillion. That’s the aggregate amount of red ink since Bush and the “fiscally conservative” Republican Party took hold of the reins of government. Divide by 298 million Americans, that’s an increase of $7,400 dollars in additional debt for each and every one of us. In less than 6 short years, the Bush administration has increased the national debt by 35% to a whopping 8.1 trillion, while championing tax cuts.
Oops, this year’s 2.77 trillion dollar budget plan doesn’t include spending for the military in Afghanistan and Iraq, or for Hurricane Katrina relief aid. But not to worry, it does call for elimination of the Social Security death benefit and would cut off survivor benefits to high school dropouts aged 16 and 17 – while eliminating all funds for dropout prevention programs, with aggregate cuts of $65 billion from Medicaid, Medicare, food stamps, education, etc.
The good news, we are building additional nuclear submarines. First time we need to sink a terrorist sub, we’re all set.
Speaking of Social Security, the president’s Social Security privatization plan is tucked away on a couple of pages of the budget. Its estimated cost over seven years: $712 billion, redirected from Social Security taxes. Did we miss the press release?
Osama Bin Laden, remember him? The man responsible for the September 11th attacks? He’s alive and well and making home videos.
The state of the union. Good job. Great work. Things have never been better.
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To link to this blog (CantonOhCouple) use [blog CantonOhCouple] in your messages.
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